Apologies if the title sounds a bit OTT - it's not meant to be...but for anyone that has had a pet, you will know what it's like to lose a close member of your family. For anyone that knows us, followed us on the socials, or watched our on demand videos; Missy has played a cameo role in some way or another. I'm not Missy contributed particularly to the guided meditation, some of the kids yoga sessions or by her general positioning on a mat mid way through a live streamed class as we tried a downward dog.
For those that have come to the studio or deck, Missy was generally on hand to leave some fur on an item of clothing as part of the complete experience.
Anyway, in late August we had to say good bye to Missy. For a Lab not to get up to greet us in the morning, usher us to the bowl for breakfast or patrol the garden; it was clear that all was not right. (She had been on various medication for a while, so we suspected the time would come sooner or later). Fortunately, our local vet was available and relatively short notice to ensure that Missy did not have to suffer too much pain or discomfort for too long.
As a family we spent the last few hours comforting her and sharing some our memories.
On reflection, it's been a positive experience to appreciate the impact Missy, and pets in a broader perspective, can have on our overall wellbeing. Hence, the reason for the blog.
It really doesn't matter what your pet is; from the 'needy' dog to an independent cat, to birds, rabbits, and even reptiles pets provide companionship, joy, and numerous health benefits. Having grown up with pets, I perhaps appreciate this more as an adult, from offering emotional support and the physical rewards associated with having a pet.
One of the most significant benefits of having a pet is the emotional support they provide. Without wanting to be too cliched pets are known to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. We are still in the stage of expecting an enthusiastic welcome home from Missy when the front door opens. I think it may well take a bit of getting used to. The simple act of petting a dog or cat can release oxytocin, a hormone associated with bonding and relaxation, and lower cortisol levels, which are linked to stress. The unconditional love that pets offer can be a comforting presence, especially in times of emotional turmoil. I am also reminded of the expression, 'Be the person your dog thinks you are,' such is their unconditional love.
Pets also provide a sense of purpose and routine. Taking care of an animal requires a certain level of responsibility, from feeding and grooming to exercise and health care. This routine can be especially beneficial for people struggling with depression or anxiety, as it gives a reason to get out of bed and stay active. I've found you also get fewer strange looks if you are talking to a dog whilst on a walk than talking to yourself. Talking through your thoughts verbally can be one way to process and order both thoughts and emotions.
Beyond emotional well-being, pets also contribute to our physical health. Dog owners, in particular, often lead more active lifestyles due to the necessity of walking and playing with their dogs. Regular physical activity is also associated with lower blood pressure, improved cardiovascular health, and better weight management. Even the act of playing with a pet indoors can be a source of exercise and movement.
If having a pet means that you have to get outside for at least 20 minutes or get some exercise for 20 minutes; then you are also adding your own wellbeing. Similarly, the companionship of a pet can help combat feelings of loneliness and isolation, offering constant, non-judgmental presence.
Though I don't have the research or science to prove it; having a pet can also improve your social life. Having a pet makes you more approachable - certainly if you are walking with a dog, rather than alone, you are more likely to generate a social interaction with someone along the way. With loneliness becoming an increasing issue in the UK for all generations, if a pet can enable a conversation or interaction then it has to be positive. (That is assuming that the pet is obedient...I'm thinking Fenton Dog here - have a look on youtube if you are not familiar with it).
For us, Missy also offered our son the change to learn invaluable lessons such as; caring, taking on responsibility, empathy, and compassion. They learn to understand the needs of another living thing, fostering a sense of nurturing and care. Certainly the bond between a person (not just a child) and a pet can be a source of comfort, learning, and personal growth. As you can see below - Missy also had our back...
Despite the many joys that pets bring into our lives, as we have found out only too well this summer, the reality is that our pets lifespans are much shorter than ours. The loss of a pet can be an emotionally hard experience. However, over th recent weeks it's been helpful to share the following tips with our son (and remind us as adults).
The first step in coping with the loss of a pet is knowing that it’s okay to mourn the loss of your pet; to shed a tear and feel sadness. We consciously giving ourselves permission to feel the pain and sadness that comes with the loss of Missy. These feelings are natural and part of the healing process; fortunately for our son I think this is the first time he is really old enough to emotionally absorb the loss of a loved one.
You can do this in a multiple of ways; from creating a photo album, a special piece of jewelry with their name, or even planting a tree in their memory. As a family, we are constantly bringing Missy up in our conversation and sharing memories of her. Friends have also been kind enough to share photos, videos and memories of her too.
We're not sure what will be next, at this time we're enjoying the memories of Missy. Whilst our studio classes and deck yoga sessions will feel a bit different, we have plenty of her antics captured in our day life whilst she was with us.
It's been a strange few weeks since we lost Missy; she undoubtedly brought a lot of happiness and amusement that we'll cherish forever. It felt only right, and appropriate, that we share the loss of our beloved member of the family. And without wanting to turn our lives into a case study, our personal reflection of having a pet has undoubtedly contributed to our overall wellbeing. Afterall, as My Life Tonic our focus is to share ways that can improve our overall wellbeing. Having a pet isn't something to be taken lightly, but if you are able to find a pet that fits in with your circumstances then it's worth thinking about.
